Teaching Your Daughter to Celebrate Herself

Young girls need to know early on they have what it takes to meet the challenges of life and of the world. They need to know they can overcome potential opposition from the people and systems around them. They need to know that they are capable of great achievements. There may be people and moments later in life which will cause them to doubt themselves, and the “personal bank” of self-love comments, capabilities, and the willingness to fight for themselves you help share with them now can be there with them as they grow– even when you can’t.

Encourage them when others don’t. Having someone in their corner even when no one else is, even when the world challenges them and seems to want them to fall short, can help your daughter understand her worth is not contingent on what others believe she is capable of. It is based on the truths every young girl needs to hear: that she matters. That she’s capable of anything and everything. That she has what it takes.

Model self-compassion. Little and big plans don’t always work out exactly the way we want them to, and it’s important we model for our children poise and self-love even in the face of these moments, and help them through their own. We have the ability to grow and move forward, we only need to love ourselves through the valley to better enjoy the peak.

Compliment often. Giving your child affirmation of their values, beliefs, and habits will help them to develop a solid sense of who they are. To further facilitate this, minimize screen time: you can’t control every voice your child hears online and in later life, so it’s important to build a strong base of self-worth outside of screen time and before it’s needed.

Share smiles. Something as simple as sharing giggles or grins as your child seeks them can help your child grow with a strong sense of joy and safety, both of which serve as a solid basis for a healthy later life.

Give them space to grow—and roots to return to. Your child won’t always be who you expect them to be—and it’s important to recognize that that’s okay. Loving who your child for who they are is more important than shaping them into who you want them to be. For more on this, the life and work of Fred Rogers, or “Mr. Rogers”, can share how to reflect these values. Simply search “Mr Rogers” on YouTube, or consider reading “Kindness and Wonder” by Gavin Edwards.

Your daughter will grow to become her own person, and grow in a world that is sometimes harsh and difficult. But with a solid foundation of love, acceptance, empathy, and modeled values, your child will grow to love themselves and others fully. Life is tough. But so is she.