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If your preschooler regularly has screaming fits, temper tantrums, or just seems to have out of control emotions, you may be unsure of what to do or how to handle it. Rest assured that your child is merely reaching a point in their emotional development where they are learning how to handle their stronger feelings, and you can help them. Here are some tips for preschoolers with a temper.
Never Reward Bad Behavior
You may regularly feel like your child always has a temper tantrum at the worst time, like in the middle of the store or around friends and family. This can make you feel as if you should agree to anything they want if they just stop their embarrassing behavior. However, rewarding tantrums only teaches them to continue using such methods to get what they want. Instead, always respond in a cool and in-control way, and articulate that there are direct consequences to their actions by saying, “You will not get X by crying or screaming.” Once you give a consequence to your child, never go back on it.
Talk it Out
One of the best things you can do for your preschooler is to teach them how to rationally process their emotions. Ask them questions that encourage them to articulate their feelings and actions. Ask them why they are crying or screaming, and then follow up by asking them if they like it when youscream or cry. Give them other ways to express their frustrations or hurt feelings (with their words), and you can even have them practice the same action regularly when you find something that works. Tell them that big girls and boys don’t throw fits—they can’t do X if they can’t be a big boy or girl.
Create A Safe, Calm Environment
Always wait until your child has calmed down when you discuss their tantrum and their feelings. It is extremely important to separate punishment from these discussions—this time should be safe and open, free of fear of punishment or anger on your side. Always end the conversations with a positive conclusion and affection.
Be Fair With Punishment
Sometimes, it’s hard to strike the balance between creating a loving and safe environment for your child’s feelings and still punishing them for bad behavior. If your child acts inappropriately, they must learn to face the negative consequences to their actions. You can still have an open and calm discussion with them about their emotions that will help them work through future scenarios while also explaining to them that they are being punished for their actions.
Overall, helping your child overcome temper tantrums can be one of the most challenging experiences, but it can also be the most rewarding. It may not be simple or easy, but if you always attempt to stay consistent with an attitude of openness but of cool authority, you will find the best way to help your child slowly mature emotionally right before your eyes.
Want to learn more about Kids ‘R’ Kids Learning Academy of Bella Terra located in Richmond, Texas? Our mission is to provide secure, nurturing, and educational environments for children ages 6 weeks – 12 years. We help children to bloom into responsible, considerate, and contributing members of society. For more information, give us a call or stop by for a tour! We’d love to get to know you and your family.